So much pain
in the head
The mind seeks
an escape
and thinks of
kissing you

©RoseGirl2021

As I lie on my bed
in the dark
and I hear the wolves
of pain howl within,
the full moon shines
through the window
upon me
and makes tears
and skin shimmer
Naked I bathe in her light
and let it absorb and heal me
let it touch, caress me
as if it is your embrace

©RoseGirl2021

Lying still
buried
underneath
a heap of pain
Within I dig up
the treasure
of love

©RoseGirl2021

Even if nights are dark
and lonely
and headaches and heartaches
rage brutally
There’s always a bird
that sings at dawn
of our love

©RoseGirl2021

Sometimes the silence between us
screams so loudly
that it is deafening
and heart hurting, heart breaking

until I quiet my mind down
and hear you, hear love
again that sings softly within
and breaks not the heart
but breaks any silence

©RoseGirl2021

The real nightmare is not
the terrifying dream I have
in which the skeletons of my
childhood come back to life
but it is when I wake up from that
in the middle of the night
bathing in horrors
and you are not there

©RoseGirl2021

And there it is again
the same old pain
that explodes harshly
and mercilessly in my head
almost impossible to bear
and as I lie in my bed
surrounded by darkness
unable to move
I surrender, I breathe, I pray
and feel the same old love
while I think of you

©RoseGirl2021

I have too many sad songs
within me
that are played
especially in lonely nights,
in lost mornings
or at unexpected times
during the day
Tearful tunes
that only I can hear
Or my love, do you hear
them too?

©RoseGirl2021

In the silent cold winter night
pain thunders in the head
and wakes up too many thoughts
The body lies still
and the heart sings a soft lullaby
that all is safe and well
that there is love, there is us
to put pain and thoughts to sleep

©RoseGirl2021

Nightmares come at night
like hyenas from all corners
to catch their prey
and bring the ghosts of the past
back to life
even when I open my eyes
I can still see them
And while I listen to a freezing cold
snow storm that rages
around the house
I crawl deep under the covers,
under the warmth of our love
to find back my dreams of the future

©RoseGirl2021

Hurt can be like a hurricane
blind rage that tears
everything down
my heart, my words helpless
unappreciated,
unrecognized
scattered
in a thousand pieces
all around me
but when I look at them
one by one
I still read their love poem
for you

©RoseGirl2021

I’m caged
inside my head
held hostage
by dark thoughts
and the only way
to break free
is to escape with you
through the heart

©RoseGirl2021

And as she lies
on her bed
enduring aches,
straight through
the thunder
she hears his
soft call,
his hopeful song
and then
with tender touch
their love puts a hand
on her forehead
and heart
to soothe her
till the storm passes

©RoseGirl2021

Waves of pain
corner me
and smash hard
and merciless
on my land
but within
the raging sea
I have
a love island
where I seek
higher ground
with you

©RoseGirl2021

While heavy pain
in the head
makes muscles
and thoughts
contract
love softens
and makes the heart
expand

©RoseGirl2021

The harder I try
not to miss you
and to keep it
out of my words
the harder it sneaks in
through the backdoor
to occupy this poem

©RoseGirl2021

And I find my breath
through aches and tears
find myself
and thus find you
To know that every time
the breath falls
it will rise again
and there’s always
a next, new breath,
there’s love
to pick me up

©RoseGirl2021

When the soldiers
of pain
occupy my head
I don’t fight
but retreat
to stay safe
with you
inside my heart

©RoseGirl2021

As severe aches turn her night
into a harsh battlefield
witnessed only by the full moon
She whispers, she smiles
‘I love you’s’ to him
through her tears
for love is still invincible

©RoseGirl2020

Migraines numb
the mind and body
but they never numb
the heart

©RoseGirl2020

Lying in my bed I listen to
the storm that howls
and rages around the house
and inside my head
in the form of migraines
and disturbing thoughts
while I find the eye of it
in my heart where love
peacefully resides
in harmony with you

©RoseGirl2020

When I go to sleep
all that awaits me
to keep me company
is an I miss you

©RoseGirl2020

When I stand on the edge
of the abyss
and I begin to fall deep
as I spiral down
into self-doubts and fears
I turn my face up to look
at stars and moon instead
to find my wings
and fly there with you

©RoseGirl2020

Nightmares create a hell at night
but within them
surrounded by their stormy waters
I’m on an island
where I create my heaven with you

©RoseGirl2020

After a night of little sleep
the dawn comes with
aches and rain
and doesn’t beat the dark
but in the end love will
make the sun return

©RoseGirl2020

When the darkness outside
is suffocating
and I don’t even know
if the wetness I sense
on my cheeks is
my tears or
it is the rain
and I seek a light
on the near horizon
but all I see are stars
light years away
their light in fact,
long gone
Then I feel you,
feel our hearts connect
and light up
and then
I can
breathe again

©RoseGirl2020

I think of you and pull
a sweet dream of love
over my head
like a blanket
so I don’t need to face
my harsh nightmares

©RoseGirl2020

There’s much more
than the pain
I am feeling
Beyond the migraine
pounding in my head
there’s you, there’s me
there’s love

©RoseGirl2020

It’s when I want to write you
but I cannot write you
that I miss you the most
It’s when the distance,
the gap between us
can’t be bridged by words

©RoseGirl2020

A merciless migraine
pierces my forehead
And ‘I miss you’s’
pierce my heart
Yet from my wounds
I bleed love

©RoseGirl2020

There is no greater,
no deeper gap
to fall in than
to miss you

©RoseGirl2020

Can you turn a light on, my love
’cause my night is darker than dark
Can you blow a kiss from afar
that will make a star above me

©RoseGirl2020

I could say a lot now
Screaming my hurt
to the heavens
Letting my fears, my tears,
my inner turmoil
rage like a hurricane
But instead,
the only thing
that comes out
is a whispered
‘I love you’

©RoseGirl2020

Self-doubts make her fall deep
into the burning fires
in the hell of her mind
Maybe she has never been an angel
but is always just a devil
in disguise
And the only thing that can make
her experience heaven
is her love for him

©RoseGirl2020

When I hold my breath
and feel so much lost
in my fears, in the dark
please find me
and bring me back
to the light of your heart
Shine me to my own
so I will feel again
love is, you are
never further away
than the next breath

©RoseGirl2020

As I go through my day,
move through deep
fears, tears and pain,
and stumble and fall
many times,
I just continue to
bravely love
the hell out of you

©RoseGirl2020

My love, please dance with me
to move away all the rain
that falls within and keeps
dropping from my heart and eyes
We’ll do a sun dance together
to bring in the new,
to take us home to ourselves,
to each other
and invoke the sun

©RoseGirl2020

I can stand on my own feet
but my love,
please hold my hand
and walk with me
as I try to find
my way out of the dark
back to the light

©RoseGirl2020

If I look back at my life
and feel bad about myself
as I only see
all the mistakes I made
all the things I’ve done wrong
all my flawed ways
then at least,
I’ve done one good deed:
to wholeheartedly
and purely love you

©RoseGirl2020

When I don’t want
to be asleep
and I don’t want
to be awake
for I don’t want
to see my nightmares
Then where to be
but to be in love
with you

©RoseGirl2020

As I lie in my bed in the dark
huge waves of fear
come rolling towards
my lonesome land
And I know the only thing
I can do is to breathe
and surrender
for on the other side of fear
there is a clear sea of love
behind the fata morgana
of troubled waters
there is our shore

©RoseGirl2020

At night when outside
it all seems so quiet
fears and aches
are the loudest
and screaming
I miss you’s occupy
the silence

©RoseGirl2020

And under a waning moon
she cries her tears
What is she to the stars
in the night sky
Can they even see her
so far away
or is she smaller than small
does she just disappear
in the dark of the earth
and is she nothing at all?

No, they reply to her
we need your heart to reflect
our light
we need your eyes to be seen
your wishes to be received
we are twinkling in the night
for you
for you deserve a place
in our spotlight

©RoseGirl2020

Keep me safe in your thoughts
safe in your heart
while I battle
with demons,
stand my ground
in a violent world

©RoseGirl2020